In real news, Typhoon Fitow (台風９号) is traveling due north, likely to hit Tokyo hard within 24 hours.
I do not worry much about the city, even though wide areas of Japan's capital are close to sea level. The amount of insanely expensive civil engineering done to prevent such a landfall from drowning large areas of some of the world's most expensive real estate is reassuringly massive.
What is more worrying is that the track of the typhoon will take it right through the center of the Kantō plain and up the spine of the Tohōku. A lot of the rice crop still has yet to be harvested and the autumn fruits are only now ready for picking. Unless the farmers are able to clear their paddies and orchards today--taking a day off from their day jobs to do so--a goodly proportion of the region's agricultural production could be lost.
As if the inhabitants of the rural areas needed yet another reason to feel desperate and angry.
Later - Here is the predicted path of the eye of the typhoon as of 17:00 JST.
Right up the wazoo.
The more intelligent of you, save what you've done, pack up and go home.
The Automatic Typing Monkeys (ATMs), you must stay at your posts.